I opted out of working a traditional 8-to-5 job once our second child came along. I turned to freelance writing as a way to keep my brain engaged and make some money on the side. While I am certain I won’t be out of the workforce permanently, I enjoy that for now I don’t have to worry about working long, inconsistent hours or displeasing my employer when my child is yet again sick, meaning I have to leave early to pick him or her up from our child care provider. I love staying at home with my children for many reasons, one being that I don’t feel the anxiety that accompanies living the rat race. Plus, staying at home with my children just feels like my calling. It’s where I am meant to be. I feel I am a stay at home mom success story…

Even though I know I am where I belong, sometimes I still struggle and feel like the stay at home mom success is well, unsuccessful. Obviously there’s a big difference between stay-at-home moms and the unemployed — but I still sometimes get weighed down by my own thoughts or by things other people say to me when they learn that I am home with children.

stay at home mom success

Photo via Flickr/Creative Commons

The word success is defined as the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. I do have days when I feel like I haven’t accomplished much. My Type A personality feels a rush completing tasks and crossing them off a checklist. I have been a list-maker for as long as I can remember. Even if the tasks are as simple as completing a load or two of laundry and (gasp!) even putting the clothes away, the act of seeing a list at the end of the day that has (most) things crossed off makes me feel productive.

So how does a stay-at-home mom determine success? Is she a mom who has a home that is spic and span from top to bottom? Is it a mom who doesn’t wear yoga pants every day and curls her hair and would never be caught in public with no makeup? Is a successful mom one whose children are always dressed to the nines and eat strictly organic food? Is it a mom whose children who get straight As in school? Those are all tall orders for “success” and ones many of us won’t achieve (or don’t care to achieve!).

While I don’t love to admit it, feeling a sense of accomplishment and success is something I miss (just a little) from my days as a career woman. I still struggle to feel successful when I have days when I feel like I haven’t done much.

Enjoying time swimming with my children on a recent trip to Florida.

But I am looking to redefine what success means to me. There are many ways to be a stay at home mom success fully. I realize that my job right now (along with those moms who work outside of the home) is to teach my children manners and show them what is important in life. It is to teach them to love others and to not judge people. It is to make sure they are kind and encourage them to persevere always.

I think true success has to do with happiness, and doing the very best that a person can – and I’m working hard to teach my kids to do their very best every day.

How do you measure success? Is it based on what you accomplish in a day? Is it based on whether you meet your goals at work? Leave a comment and let us know.

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