There are benefits of having all girls — besides, “trying for a boy” doesn’t always work out that way.
My husband and I have two daughters. There’s a lot of pink in our house, and a lot of estrogen. My husband is outnumbered by the girls. Even our cat is a girl.
People sometimes ask if we have plans to “try for a boy.” This implies that we somehow have control over whether we conceive a girl or a boy. We “tried for a boy” with baby number two, and that didn’t work, so I’m not confident that the third time would be a charm.
When we learned we were having a second daughter, we briefly thought about the life we were missing by not having any boys. Then we thought of all the benefits of having children who are close in age and the same gender, specifically only girls.
Benefits of having all girls include …
My daughters can wear the same clothes.
We pack away all of my older daughter’s outgrown clothes so her younger sister can wear them someday. We save money not having to purchase two sets of clothes for children of different genders.
My daughters play with the same toys.
There are almost four years between my daughters, so they don’t always play with the same toys at the same time, although that is changing as they grow older. They both like Barbie, American Girl (Bitty Baby for the younger sister), Lego Friends, and Star Wars. They sometimes get shared gifts for both of them to enjoy at Christmas and Easter. The play room is full of toys that appeal to both girls. Again, this saves money and saves space because we don’t need so many separate sets of toys for each child.
My daughters can play with toys for girls or boys.
Like I mentioned, they play with Barbies, but they also like Star Wars and super heroes. On a typical summer evening, they’re often running around on the front lawn with plastic light sabers in their hands and super hero capes flying behind their backs. My youngest daughter also loves dinosaurs. Even if girls play with the most boy-ish toys like trucks, most people are cool with that. Whether you like it or not, boys face more social judgment for playing with toys like dolls that are deemed to be for girls. My girls have choices, just one of many benefits of having all girls.
My daughters have similar tastes in entertainment.
They sometimes read the same books and watch the same movies. Hosting Friday Family Movie Night is always a breeze. They enjoy watching movies with female protagonists, and they like reading picture books geared toward girls like Madeleine or Fancy Nancy. Even if they don’t enjoy the same books and movies simultaneously because of their age difference, in a few years my younger daughter is likely to enjoy whatever her older sister reads and watches now. While we get many of our books and movies free from the library, we again save money on what we do purchase because we don’t have to get two sets of books and movies for children of different genders.
Any color is fine for my daughters.
They can wear pink, or black, or blue, or whatever they want. They can get the pink and purple toy laptop computer or the gender-neutral green and blue one. They can paint their rooms pink and purple or green and blue. Girls have flexibility and options, unlike most boys who generally don’t wear or play with pink or purple things.
My daughters are involved in the same extracurricular activities (for now).
Right now, both girls enjoy taking gymnastics classes. It keeps our lives and schedules fairly simple when the kids go to the same place for extracurricular activities. And the older daughter can pass her outgrown leotards to her younger sister. Saving money — another of the benefits of having all girls!
It’s easy for my daughters to use public restrooms.
If I take my girls out on my own, which I have often done as a stay-at-home mom, we can all use the same restroom. Some of my friends who are moms of boys have talked about struggling to determine at what age those boys should use public men’s restrooms alone, and they worry about being judged if someone in a women’s restroom deems their boys “too old.”
My daughters can share a bed in a hotel room.
As my daughters grow into teenagers, they can still share a double bed when we travel. If we had one girl and one boy, it would be more appropriate at hotels to request (and potentially spend extra money on) a roll-away bed, fold-out couch, or an adjoining room once the kids reach certain ages.
My daughters have a built-in best friend.
I’m a little bad about remembering to schedule play dates sometimes because my daughters have each other. That’s not totally bad, is it?
My daughters don’t need multiple haircuts a year.
Short boy haircuts require more maintenance. Girls can go years between haircuts if they want to, although we aim to get hair trimmed once or twice a year to keep it looking healthy.
As my daughters grow older, they are more likely to maintain a close bond.
Sisters have certain shared life experiences that are distinctly female. This isn’t to say that brothers and sisters are never close, nor is it a guarantee that sisters will always be best friends. But a pair of sisters can talk about things like periods, bras, shaving, relationships with boys, marriage, pregnancy, childbirth, and raising families.
How about your family? What benefits of having all girls, all boys, or a mix of both, do you see?
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