Over the weekend I read a post on Babble titled Things I’ll Never Do In Front of My Husband by a woman who claims she has been married for nine years. I mention her years of marriage skeptically because some of the things on her list seem silly, if not impossible, to maintain for any relationship that is older than two weeks. The highlights include:
|Do you cut your toenails in front of your guy?|
- Use the restroom.
- Pass gas.
- Cut toenails.
When I posted the link on Mumbling Mommy’s Facebook page, a lot of readers were appalled at the list including my own husband (who is regularly around when I do all three of the things above). I’m glad I’m not alone in allowing my husband to see me in my less-than-perfect moments but it did get me thinking. Do I have my own set of limitations when it comes to my own marriage? Where do I draw the line between sharing everyday moments with my spouse, and being uncomfortable?
Here is my own short list of things I will (probably) NEVER do in front of my husband.
- Use a breast pump. I’m not saying men shouldn’t see this — I’m saying that I have never felt less sexy than when I was strapped to electronic suction cups and essentially milked. My husband often saw our youngest on my breast and neither of us were bothered. The breast pump, on the other hand, was something I kept behind closed doors.
- Make coffee. He hates the smell. He swears it gives him a headache. He quit a job at a bookstore once because it reeked of coffee. He threatens to get me pregnant again just so I will stop drinking coffee. So I make it before he wakes up in the morning — on the shelf outside my kitchen window, with the window as far down as it will go with the cord still reaching inside. I drink it inside but the actual brewing happens outdoors.
- Watch my guilty pleasure shows. He sits through shows like “The Good Wife” and an occasional “Sex and the City” rerun by my side, even if it may not be exactly what he wants to watch. I’m not talking about those shows. I’m talking about the “Snapped” and E! True Hollywood Story marathons I used to have before we got married — the shows I scour our digital TV Guide to find on the nights he works late. Would he think less of me for watching them? Probably not. But I wouldn’t be able to giddily enjoy them to the proper extent if he was on the couch too.
What about you? Is there anything that is off-limits in your marriage — or is every detail shared?
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