|Family Outing to the St. Louis Magic House. See, it’s easy!|
“Better you than me!”
“Oh wow, you really have your hands full.”
“I think I would die if I found out I was having twins.”
These are just some of the encouraging things people have said to me out in public. Strangers
aren’t very good with words. Let’s just put it that way. Are twins easy? Well, no. But they are not any harder than your kids just because they are twins. There just happens to be two of them.
Now don’t get me wrong. There are days when someone says, “Oh I’ve always wanted twins!” and my reply is “I can easily make these two adoptable!” They look at me in horror. How could anyone joke about giving up their kids??!?! Haha. Someone who had two at once. That’s how! I love my girls. All three of them. I absolutely would not give them up for the world. Having twins IS easy for me because I am used to it now. That first night home wasn’t easy but by a week or two in, we had the system down pat. Here we are over a year later, still alive and it just feels like second nature. We have a routine and we stick to it.
Here’s the thing though, we were parents the first time to just one baby. And that was scary! Do you remember your first night at home with a new baby? It doesn’t matter if it is one baby or six. It is not easy at first. But it becomes that way. You get your babies on a schedule. You learn their cues. You figure it out. Guess what? Same thing for two babies. There’s just less downtime in the middle.
Being the mom of twins is second nature so I don’t really realize how hard it is anymore because it’s my every day. I don’t go around telling strangers that it is easy though. My answer is normally, you get used to it once you survive the first 6 months. And even that is sugar coating it. But trust me; I do not go around complaining to strangers or trying to scare them either. And no, I did not die when I found out I was having twins. I wasn’t immediately excited but to compare the event to death is just a bit over exaggerated.
I am not a victim of having twins and there’s no room for “woe is me.” I think the concept that parents should feel guilty for thinking any part of parenting is hard just because kids are a blessing is wrong. Parenting has its ups and downs. We all have that bad day where nothing goes right and we forget just how much a blessing the craziness is. It’s human nature.
So what is your take home here? Moms and dads, just because you don’t have twins doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to think parenting is hard. We all have different stories. I don’t cringe thinking about having triplets. So there is no reason for you to do the same thinking about me having twins. We all just figure it out. Parenting is hard; we don’t need to add unnecessary negativity into the mix.
Tags: Amateur Parenting